Criminally Gorgeous

While the controversy surrounding the band Pussy Riot threatens to bring the whole Putin regime crashing to the ground, this sage observer of world affairs ponders the timeless question, in the eyes of men, can a good-looking woman ever truly be guilty of anything really bad? Of course, Latin telenovelas have taught us the answer to that question must be yes, but come on guys, just look at them! 

Going from left to right, we have Pussy Riot band member Nadezhda Tolokonnikova, clearly innocent of all charges. Next we have Amanda Knox, who doesn't look like she could do anything really wrong. And last we have Manson family member Leslie Van Houten, who seems the victim of a big misunderstanding.

If I were the defense attorney representing any of these women, I would simply instruct the handpicked all-male jury to just look at them.

Note: this defense will not work for good-looking men.