Thursday, June 01, 2006

Where I Work

I work at an exciting place. The homeless just love our building. We had a couple camp right outside the front door obstructing our access for several weeks. And then there’s another homeless guy who somehow manages to get inside every now and again. You can always tell he’s in the building by the overpowering stench that assaults your senses the moment you step through the door. It’s like having your head forcibly held down into a basketful of sweaty socks and putrefying meat. You turn the corner and there he is, standing by the elevator with a winter coat on (despite the mild temperature) doing nothing. He has kind of a defeated air about him. Maybe it’s because of the fetid air about him.

Last Friday night, thieves broke into the hair salon on the third floor by removing the air conditioner and squirming through the hole. They robbed that place and the next floor up as well, probably because those poor saps on the fourth floor forgot to lock their back stairway door. And yesterday we had a parked car burst into flames right out in front. Fire engines and black smoke everywhere! John H. took some pictures and hopefully we’ll get a post from him about it soon.

When the Yankees come to town, they stay at the Ritz Carlton across the street. A sure sign the Yankees are here is the small crowd of autograph seekers that forms up at 9:00 in the morning. Last time, Johnny Damon and his wife shopped at Burberry’s, which is just next door to us. As they crossed the street with Johnny’s arms laden with bagfuls of his wife’s goodies, an autograph hound asked Johnny for his signature. Johnny showed him the bags and moved along. Of course. Then, when the Yankees bus arrived to take them to the ballpark, the hotel staff roped off the section the Yankees have to walk through to get to the bus. A lot of the players are good sports and do a lot of signing — balls and bats have to be a pain to write on. I saw Robinson Cano wear his hand out last time.

How about where you work? Much going on there?

22 Comments:

Blogger LL said...

Yes, and I blog about it semi-regularly. :P

We too have our share of hounds about, but they usually only show up during the wintertime when they chase cougars.

Not many homeless either. I mean earlier this spring we got deluged with them, but since that time they've all built nests in the various nooks and cranneys of my eve's and trees. Then I watched them doing the nasty from my front window, so I'm sure that additions to the family are well on their way already.

6:50 AM  
Blogger Scott said...

I work in Watertown. Not much to report. Where you work is breathtaking. We'll have to do lunch again so I can come see it again!

7:16 AM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

"I mean earlier this spring we got deluged with them, but since that time they've all built nests in the various nooks and cranneys of my eve's and trees."

So they're not homeless anymore.

We don't like it when our homeless build nests.


"We'll have to do lunch again so I can come see it again!"

by all means — come on down!

7:44 AM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

Nothing exciting at all happens where I work. It's a huge campus which is closed off with huge wrought iron gates every night around 6:30/7:00 p.m. and opened in the morning around 5:00 (I think) with a gatehouse at the far south end if you absolutely have to be here after 6:30 or before 5:00.

8:55 AM  
Blogger trinamick said...

Nope. Nothing going on here. Boring as ever.

9:27 AM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

Kathleen, you work at a university and nothing ever happens? How can that be?


"Nope. Nothing going on here. Boring as ever."

Yeah, right. Your office is a sitcom.

9:40 AM  
Blogger Wordnerd said...

I'm in the parish (county to you folks) courthouse -- family court, criminal court, civil court, records...

Each floor has its own show!

10:58 AM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

Schprockie - I used to work at a University, but it was in the 'burbs and was a commuter campus so not much happened. I now work for a major corporation with huge "campus" for lack of a better term. I could bitch about engineers....

11:41 AM  
Blogger tiff said...

We had the thrill of having the facilities guy actually ASK us if we were too cold or too warm today. It was almost as surreal as having a grocery store clerk LOOK at you.

If I turn around to llo out my office window (I love saying that), I can see a nice fountain and a pretty courtyard and all the nicotine addicts taking a smoke break. This is North Carolina, land of the evil weed, after all, and cigs are still cheap and plentiful.

1:14 PM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

"I'm in the parish (county to you folks) courthouse -- family court, criminal court, civil court, records...

"Each floor has its own show!"

My wife is a P.O. You two could swap some stories.


"I could bitch about engineers...."

Hey, HEY! Some of my best friends are engineers…


"If I turn around to look out my office window (I love saying that), I can see a nice fountain and a pretty courtyard and all the nicotine addicts taking a smoke break."

Here in Boston the office buildings have designated smoking areas for the social pariahs — I mean smokers — to go to. It actually looks like they're having a good time chatting with one another.

1:27 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

I'm a stay at home mom. Work is my home, which is always being renovated, inside and out. Can you say "sheet rock dust"? I know you can.

It would be seriously weird if a homeless person parked outside of my place of work. nyuk nyuk

2:42 PM  
Blogger Farrago said...

I couldn't tell you about office things right now because I haven't actually BEEN to the office for a while, now. Oh, there's the occasional blip in for a day or two...if I can remember how to get there. My office lately has been a coach seat on a Boeing B-737 or Airbus A-319, or some personality-free luxury hotel ballroom, and with the exception of the rumor of certain somebodies spending too much off-time together, it's pretty milquetoast.

What's really aggravating is all of the autograph hounds who descend upon me when I leave the hotel, begging me to sign their bats, balls, breasts, butts and foreheads.

I mean, come ON, really. FOREHEADS?!

4:02 PM  
Blogger magnetbabe said...

Some of my best friends are engineers…

Actually, I'm a physicist. That's okay, people get us confused all the time. *wink*

My lab is right across the hall from the teaching labs. So every two hours we get masses of undergraduates milling about the hall who think they own the place. They block the doors and then get mad when we open the doors and accidently (or not) bump into them. Once I actually crashed the door into two people making out. No joke.

5:19 PM  
Blogger Spirit Of Owl said...

Where I work is where I live. Getting out more is a curious dream. Stuff happening is a long running tap. [sigh]

5:54 PM  
Blogger boo said...

i'm in publishing sales so i'm out most of the time. i rarely have time to check out our aging building. but i'm guessing its nothing exciting like your building. well, with the exception of the indian lady ghost in the men's loo. she's ruled there for 25 years. men in the building pee without a hitch. and as for jack & edna sleeping outside your door.... i dunno....

5:55 PM  
Blogger LL said...

"Actually, I'm a physicist."

I'm sooo, soooo sorry. Do you have a good support group? :P

One of these days I'm gonna have to ask you an occupational question or two...

6:18 PM  
Blogger NYPinTA said...

"Actually, I'm a physicist."

I'm sooo, soooo sorry. Do you have a good support group? :P

One of these days I'm gonna have to ask you an occupational question or two...


magnetbabe, run while you still can. Trust me. :P

Where I work I am surrounded by parking lots which are surrounded by trees... and that's about it.
In the 12 years that I have been here, we have had two homeless men come and sit in our waiting room for a bit. They had some complimentary coffee and went on their way with some urging by our GM. It was... weird.
Oh and today, a customer had her puppy with her. He was tiny and wouldn't shut up. Fun.

7:44 PM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

"Can you say "sheet rock dust"? I know you can."

In another life I was a housepainter and know all about sheet rock dust. Too much, in fact.


"What's really aggravating is all of the autograph hounds who descend upon me when I leave the hotel, begging me to sign their bats, balls, breasts, butts and foreheads."

I know what you mean. I hate it when all the hot blondes keep throwing their panties and hotel room keys at me. I'm only one guy, for crying out loud! Only so much to go around.


"Once I actually crashed the door into two people making out. No joke."

Did they tell you they were conducting an experiment? You know, sacrificing themselves for science?

"well, with the exception of the indian lady ghost in the men's loo."

Oh come on! I was asking for something out of the ordinary! We've got two Indian lady ghosts in our mens room right now.


"One of these days I'm gonna have to ask you an occupational question or two..."

She said "physicist," not "psychiatrist," Lord Loser.


"Oh and today, a customer had her puppy with her. He was tiny and wouldn't shut up. Fun."

Maybe you should have shown the puppy the microwave oven in the employee lounge.

Sorry — that was wrong.

6:03 AM  
Blogger LL said...

Et tu Schprockus?

3:39 PM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

Just kidding, my noble lord.

6:02 AM  
Blogger LL said...

I know, fear not. Clever jabs will never be taken in the wrong light by me. Especially by a someone as self-deficating as yourself. :P

6:56 AM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

Yeah, I am kind of self-defica—

Hey, wait a minute!

7:42 AM  

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