Monday, July 24, 2006

John Lester

Every time I get a chance to sit down and watch a Red Sox game, John Lester is pitching. I swear it’s unplanned — it just works out that way. With all honesty I can tell you I don’t even know the Sox’s starting rotation — and, by the way, it can be argued that manager Terry Francona doesn’t know either — so it’s not as if I’ve calculated which day Lester starts so I can plant my fanny in front of the TV set just to watch him.

For those who don’t follow the Boston Red Sox (and I would like explanations for why this is from those people apparently lost in hardball wilderness), John Lester is the rookie lefty starter who by happenstance has found himself up in the big leagues at the grand old age of 22. In spring training, the Sox pitching staff was all set, but then things happened, guys got hurt, and suddenly young arms were being called up from the minor league club like bad guy reinforcements in a kung fu movie. Half the Sox pitchers don’t even need to shave yet. And this one kid, John Lester — who looks like he should be delivering papers instead of being written up in them — has actually held his own. He has five victories, no defeats, and a bunch of no decisions — like yesterday.

Here’s the problem with John Lester: he has this habit of getting behind in the count (throwing more balls than strikes to the batter) and waits until there are two runners in scoring position, only one out, and he’s down to the hitter three balls to one strike before he proceeds to wriggle his way out of the jam while taking a coffee break in between every pitch. It drives me bananas! I age a year every time I watch him pitch! Somebody tell that kid to throw strikes!


Anybody who knows me knows I’m a big M. Night Shyamalan fan (pronounced sha-man-ah-lam-ah-lan-ah-lam-ah-lan-ah-man-oh-man). He almost lost me with The Village, but I managed to hold on and ultimately decided I liked it — I even own the DVD. But after watching Lady in the Water last Friday, all I can say is: Sorry, Night, this time I can’t do it. I can only suspend my disbelief so far and for so long. I’ll patiently wait for your next film.

One movie I saw this weekend which I highly recommend is Match Point, a masterpiece by Woody Allen. People who have seen Crimes and Misdemeanors know Woody is capable of this — in fact, having seen Crimes and Misdemeanors, I wasn’t all that surprised by the ending. It is powerful and beautifully filmed. To those who haven’t seen it, I have this to say: Watch it. Watch it! WATCH IT!


That’s all I’ve got. Maybe next post I’ll discuss life or the universe or something.


Blogger Scott said...

I am vindicated Mr. Schprock. I'm glad you liked Match Point. Of course this means I'll have to watch Crimes and Misdemeanours.

Horay for our side. I love it when a long shot makes it in the big leagues!

4:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm a big M. Night fan, too, but the previews have not done it for me. Thanks for helping me hold on to my $$$!

4:12 PM  
Anonymous dreadmouse said...

This may cost me my admittance to your blog, Herr Schprock, but I don't particularly care for baseball. I find it boring to watch. I'll play it quite happily, but watch it? Meh. Why bother?

The funny thing is that I watch golf on television, which I know is even more boring than baseball. Go figure.

6:56 AM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

Scott, I should have mentioned your recommendation for Match Point. What a movie!

Wordnerd, I can say that I didn't feel "Lady" wasn't worth the money — I was entertained at any rate. I just didn't work for me.

DM, I love watching golf and I don't even play. Why is that, I wonder?

7:23 AM  
Blogger tiff said...

M Night is better reading material, in my opine. However, because I don't often the chance to go to movies (see: one job, 2 kids, 2 dogs, and life), I'll take this recommendation and run with it. Maybe we'll NetFlix it...

What IS it with pitchers that go behind on the count just to catch up? Don't they know it makes us crazy? Smae can be said for all come from behind teams. Just get out front and STAY there, I say, so I can go get another beer at the concession stand in peace!

8:46 AM  
Blogger Flood said...

I read the spoiler for Lady in the Water and want my 3 minutes back, so I'm thankful I didn't go.

BTW, been reading Susie Beans and really enjoying it.

10:00 AM  
Blogger mr. schprock said...

"Just get out front and STAY there, I say, so I can go get another beer at the concession stand in peace!"

Amen, Tiff. Amen.

"BTW, been reading Susie Beans and really enjoying it."

God bless you, Flood! That was when I first started writing again. Boy I had a good time doing that!

1:56 PM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

My good friend Glen and I were discussing our favorite plays/happenings in baseball (it had been a talk radio topic the day before, I think). He mentioned a pitcher getting himself into deep sh*t like your John Lester and then pitching himself out of it. Our very own Nate Robertson (It's Gum Time!) had done it the previous game. I think Nate had bases loaded (or at least with someone on 3rd) with one out and he got himself out of the jame. Nervewracking, most definitely.

Sadly, I forget what I chose, although I'm very fond of a beautiful crisp double play.

4:47 AM  
Blogger briliantdonkey said...

ahhh a fellow Bosox fan, yes Lester has a tendency to drive us nuts. The results have been awesome so far though.


7:13 PM  

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